Time of death…11:30pm

Crappiest Valentine's yet!

I have had some crap Valentine's days in my lifetime. I've been stood up, I've been broken up with and I have been alone. But I have never experienced a death on Valentine's day. 

I couldn't imagine a world without love. We love freely and openly. We love innocently and joyfully. But when a loved one passes it's so hard to remember that each of us, each soul on earth is here for but a brief moment in time. 

We are on loan from our Loving Heavenly Father. He has given us the people and animals in our lives. 

I know it sounds silly. I didn't lose a relative, I lost someone close to my heart a dear, innocent, loving and kind companion. She was only with us for such a short time. But oh the joy she brought into my life and to the lives of all that snuggled her. 

I will forever miss my sweet little fluffy bun bun. 

Rest in Peace my little Pipp Squeak. 

Mama loves you. 

Help is inside of us

Each new member of the Church needs friendship, a responsibility, and nurturing with  

“the good word of God” 

"And after they had been received unto baptism, and were wrought upon and cleansed by the power of the Holy Ghost, they were numbered among the people of the church of Christ; and their names were taken, that they might be remembered and nourished by the good word of God, to keep them in the right way, to keep them continually watchful unto prayer, relying alone upon the merits of Christ, who was the author and the finisher of their faith."(Moroni 6:4). 

We can help new members by befriending them, serving alongside them, and sharing our testimonies with them. 

"What does it mean to be a true friend?"

 To me a true friend is someone who

 loves unconditionally. Someone who doesn't care where you came from, or what you have done but sees who you are and where you are going. Our Savior is one of the truest and most compassionate friends we have. And we can each be that kind of friend to our newest most fragile testimonies. I know that we can each be a good friend to a new member of the church. Invite them into our homes, and to our family home evenings. Let's make sure their testimonies grow stronger by being the very best example of the Savior.

"Why is it especially important for us to be good friends to new members of the Church?"

Midnight Blues

As I lay here staring into the dark,  I can hear my husbands breathing softly and heavily, as he sleeps deeply.  I can feel the three cats positioned around me.  (My own personal heaters) Oh they make me so jealous.  I wish my brain had a turn off switch.  I wish the brutal stabbing pain in my back would cease and let me rest.  I wish my finger and arm didn't hurt so bad.  I wish I could make the tears stop falling.  I wish for a Massage, to be perfectly honest. 

Hmm Oh the dreams I have.  The peace I have is that I know I will one day have a perfect pain free body. 

But I can wait till then.  So in the meantime I'll hide the tears for midnight while the rest are sleeping soundly. 

ISO: a girl who wants to be my friend

 Oh Where oh where has my little lamb gone?

Girls need girlfriends!

I love my husby so very much. He is my best friend, he will always be my favorite husby! But talking to him about hot flashes, sore breasts and fingernail colors is liking having a conversation with a 2 year old. Girls need girls to talk to. 

I am surrounded by people I love and appreciate, I walk around as if in a fog, doing the mundane daily tasks. 

I do my callings, I work on preschool and day care stuff, I plan activities, dinners, FHE. I clean the house, do the laundry, avoid the dishes *I'm very good at the one!*
What I really would love is to steal away with a girlfriend one afternoon and hit up a restuarant on third street I've never been to and sit and giggle and be girls. Maybe try on clothes at a clothing store, defintely try on shoes and jewelry. 

So I guess this is my very sad and meager attempt to find a friend. WOW I sound really pathetic. 

*****Disregard this entire Blog post,& continue with whatever you were doing before. Indeed this is 5 minutes you'll never get back. 

Sorry! 

Preparing for substitute parenthood

A NEW Adventure

A few months back Pacer and I decided that we wanted to start the process to become Foster Parents. We had our first training yesterday at DHS. It was such an emotional, eye opening day. I have never really known anyone in foster care, or has been a foster parent. I have been living in my safe little bubble of a world. 

I guess the only word I can use to describe how I am feeling about this whole process is terrified. Not about the children that I will have in my home, not for the birth parents whom I will have constant communication with, not what others will think. But about whether or not I am going to be a better example, have loving arms to hold a scared child, will I have the patience? The unconditional love that these children so desire and crave? Will I be able to let them go at the end of their time? 

CAN I EMULATE MY SAVIOR?

I can only imagine how he felt when he had all the little children around him. How he looked into the sweet angelic faces and loved them with a love that is so difficult to comprehend. 
I want to love and care for these children. I want them to leave her feeling that they are not unwanted, unlovable, terrible children.